Merged RL with FFXI blog!

	Tony’s boyfriend checklist
Name: Robin	Duration: Never happened, in my mind? 4 weeks
Occupation: PhD student	Where we met: Masspectrometry Course
	Beginner Level
____	Can say “I love you”
____	Isn’t hiding another boyfriend.
____	Thinks kissing is sexy
√	Has a glowy smile
√	Is at least marginally sensitive
√	Will probably remember my name the next morning
	Intermediate Level
____	Can say “I love you” without my saying it first
____	Likes me enough to tell me I’m special
√	Trusts me enough to tell me I’m wrong
____	Teases me when I need it but knows when to stop
____	Pursues making me laugh as a hobby
√	Pretends to like the same things I do even when he doesn’t
____	Misses me when we’re apart
____	Isn’t afraid to fight with me
____	Allows to drive him crazy
____	Would rather do nothing with me than something by himself
____	Can fall asleep in my lap while I study — and still call it a date.
	Top-of-the-line level
____	Can say “I love you” with his eyes
____	Never lies (except to spare my feelings)
____	Doesn’t worry about losing me because he knows he can’t.
____	Forgets there was a time when we didn’t know eachother.
____	Kisses me for no good reason
____	Celebrates my faults
____	Sighs when I hold him
____	Lets me have a time-off when I need it.

I like him so much, a lot really, but I don’t know what to do? Some say that I should take the initiative and talk to him? But I’m not someone like that, but on the other hand, what do I have to lose? Except maybe my dignity? And self respect? *sigh*

A friend sent me a quote today from The Sandman…

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses. You build up a whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life…

You give them a piece of you. They didn’t ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like ‘maybe we should be just friends’ or ‘how very perceptive’ turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart.

It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. Nothing should be able to do that. Especially not love. I hate love.”
- The character “Rose Walker” in The Sandman

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FFXI update?

Oh right, I’m pretty much getting bored with it. Not much happening, thinking of returning to Phoenix. But I don’t know how to break it out for the linkshell, they recently funded me a Jubbah, and I haven’t really been active enough to think that I’ve compensated for it, and I don’t want to leave it on bad terms. :/

I think two new updates has been since I was on. SCH merit category 1 and 2. I don’t really know what to say about them, they don’t seem that good to be honest – the Relic for SCH body looks pretty nice though. Enhanced Sublimation?

Keryu lent me his new tuxedo. I think I look super charming in it!